The apartment smells like shit!

Dear AL:
My wife has a problem. It doesn't matter what she eats, she just farts nonstop! Doctors say there's nothing wrong with her, that it's just something I have to learn to live with. She so use to it she doesn't notice passing gas anymore, and when I bring it up she laughs. Al, the apartment smells like shit, any suggestions?
-- David, Toronto, Canada

Yo David:
If you're not too attached, you could leave her stinky ass, you know. Threaten her with divorce if she doesn't plug that hole up!

If you can't bring yourself to say it, go buy yourself a Bic. Either she farts in the bathroom, or you'll light her ass up! Easy!

Nobody should have to put up with that shit!


MissMeliss said...

Hah! I've always wondered if you actually CAN light farts.

Heather said...

Hah! I was going to say buy some extra strength GasEx but the lighter sounds like more fun

TheTorch said...

It is not healthy to supress bodily functions.

Nadine said...

Haha! I hope he doesn't turn the house on fire while lightning his wife's ass.

Webmiztris said...

my husband is good at stinking up a room. in the summer, it's not so bad because I can just 'crack' a window, but in the winter, it's totally 'bullshit'!

Rose said...

Better out then in. :)