My wife is a Ho!

Dear al:
My wife is a HO! Every weekend she goes out clubbing with her girlfriends, but I know she's window shopping! Last week I found a phone number on the floor by our jackets! Al, how can I get her to stay home with me, watch a movie, and cuddle? I have a small penis, but that can't be the problem, because I know how to use it!
-- Josh, North Carolina

Dear Josh:
Happy to hear that you're proficient with your pecker, but why do you want the world to know? Hoping your wife reads your message to remind her how good she has it at home? I'm not Dr. Ruth!

First you have to stop calling your wife a ho, even if she is. Then you need to get out, take your wife to dinner, dancing, drinking, do something crazy, but still let her hang out with her friends. You'll have plenty of time to cuddle when you come home wasted, plus your tiny penis might get some play! I hope this helped!

11 comments:

lastlifeinmyuniverse said...

small penis ? i think monika should answer this...

i could but i wont. im just not willin to relive the nightmare in my head.

Mr. Universe said...

Al, why did you have to go there, calling his small penis a pecker? It's not his fault it's small! Just wonder what drugs he's on to be telling the world!

boo said...

but does he use it on her?

Monika said...

HEY!

Whadaya mean I should answer this? My experience can't help him, the woman MARRIED him!

I took a look at it and ran for the hills.

Sweety said...

ROTFLOL!

lastlifeinmyuniverse said...

"ran for the hills" LOL

okay fine ! so we both cant answer it :P

Monika said...

lol...

Webmiztris said...

lucky guy! bet he could convince her to do a threesome!

Nukes and Candy said...

Good answer AL.

Look Josh, your wife wants some action, she wants to go crazy, scream while mini-skirt dance atop of the tables.

You... you want to watch the trilogy of Star Wars.

So either satisfy the woman you married, or get a new one that'll make you your popcorn on Monday-Tuesday- Wednesday-Thursday-Friday-Movie Night.

Forget about your "junior". You self conscious only makes it worse man.

Delaleuverses said...

Al you have written volume of truths here, Josh is missing action at home but he needs to do his homework, take some notes and learn a few tricks.

Rose said...

If your wife is going out every weekend then she isn't happy at home. Maybe you need to ask her why?