Looking For A Better Dirty Half!

Darling Dearest Al:
I'm 21. I feel like my biological clock is telling me that it's time to start seriously looking for a "better half". The problem is, the girls in my immediate social circle are not at all interesting to me. I'm at a Theological school you see, and most of the girls are BORING.

Now, I myself am a fairly devout Christian, and hope to find a Christian girl... but not too nice, if you take my meaning. Really, they are boring and cheesy here. I want a girl that can be just a touch rude and nasty with me. I don't know if they're repressed from an overly conservative up-bringing or if they were born that way, but man... anyway, it's rough. I'm praying that God will send a dirty girl my way soon.

Don't actually know what my problem is, but you seem like a helpful guy.
-- ninjaaron, http://ninjasgonewildincph.blogspot.com

Dear ninjaaron:
I bet there are a few closet cases at your school who seem to be boring, but are in need of a freak like you! Look for strategically placed piercings, tongues, eyebrows, bottom lips, but steer clear of the pierced cheeks! Second, every school has their share of day dreamers, be on the look at for these space cadets! And Last, a sure sign of the dirtiest of dirty girls are the ones that stink. She'll rock your world, that's if you don't faint from lack of fresh air! I hope this helped!