My Parents Hardly Notice!

Dear Al:
I'm studying Chinese, starting to get really good SAT scores, and I'm a straight A student... my parents hardly even notice! I even placed tenth in the region for a competition and they barely glanced at my certificate. Any suggestions?
-- Suzhen, Dallas

Dear Suzhen:
See what happens when you blast music in your room... they're deaf! Sudden deafness also causes Vertigo, dizziness, loss of balance, so if by luck you do get your parents attention, it would be almost impossible for them to focus on your performance records if they're swaying all over the place. To solve this problem, catch them while they're sitting down and announce your performance with a bullhorn megaphone!
Works every time, until they're completely deaf.

I hope this helped!


lastlifeinmyuniverse said...

start failing your classes ? just kiddin of course *whistles*

Mr. Universe said...

Dear Abby has nothing on you, AL! Your wisdom will be remembered through out the ages!

Dear AL said...

lastlifeinmyuniverse, that's a sure attention grabber! Then her friends will start ignoring her thinking she's an idiot!

Jonathan, you'll be remembered as a DORK! Right about Dear Abby!

Tracie B. said...

hey, why didn't i think of that?