Dear Al:
I am wondering about my fiancee. He tells me that he is never happy. There was a time where he even had a plan to kill himself. At that point he actually reluctantly talked to a psychologist and was admitted overnight to the hospital. Well now he is depressed, doesn't seem to really have any goals and will not (and I repeat WILL NOT) get help. I cannot force him to talk to someone because he has not actually tried to hurt himself, but I am very worried about him. I see him be depressed day in day out and I just want to see him happy again. I just don't know what to do anymore, because I try to encourage him to talk to me, but he bottles up. What should I do? I don't want to force him to do anything, but this is just not right. He should not be this depressed all the time, but he won't get help. What am I supposed to do? -- Rose
Dear Rose:
The best course of action is to continue showing him love, do things with him to get his mind off his problems for a little while, and when you feel he's more relaxed, talk to him again about seeing a professional ASAP. If he still doesn't want to get help, continue what I stated above (love, doing things together) in hope he'll do the right thing himself.
Last course of action if nothing seems to be helping is to move on and don't look back. I'm sorry, but you have to take care of yourself. Don't let him drag you down.
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