My feet stink. What would you do in my shoes?

Dear Al:
The most wonderful man I ever had in my life left me. He left me because my feet stink! I haven't noticed it myself that night, but when he started becoming distant to the point that he kept getting up to use the toilet every ten minutes at our favorite restaurant, I knew something was wrong. At first I thought it was diarrhea when I asked him to which he responded "Don't you smell it?" I said jokingly "It's ok... you cleaned your ass pretty good." He then said "Not me, you..." which I responded "I don't have the runs." Then all of a sudden he got up stating that he has to run, but it wasn't to the toilet this time. He ran out of the restaurant! When I caught him outside he apologized and said that he couldn't do this anymore and almost threw up as he pointed to my feet! I was speechless! I knew I had a little problem, but I didn't think it was that bad! He then walked away, looking back at me... slowly panning down to my feet. I then caught myself a taxi, but was only driven halfway home before I got kicked out!

Al, I've been together with this person for almost two months, but it feels like forever! There's got to be something I could do about my feet! What would you do in my shoes?
-- Leslie, Down Under

Dear Leslie:
Take them off! Think I want to stink?!

Seriously, you need to wash your feet twice everyday in a bathtub or basin. You wont get good results showering to avoid touching your funk. Once they're dry, powder them. Try to wear open sandals. But if you have athletes foot, cover that crap with socks! See a freakin doctor!

You also need to change out your shoes. Don't rock the same ones everyday!

Maybe he'll come back once you have corrected this problem. But if not, at least the people at the restaurant will be happy.

Girlfriend found another girls phone number

Hey AL:
My girlfriend is very upset with me. She found another girls phone number in my jeans back pocket. I tried to explain to her that my buddy planted it there as a joke while we was wrestling, but she's not buying it. How can I patch things up?
-- Jeff, Australia

Yo Jeff:
Start by telling her the truth. Your buddy reaching into your back pocket has to be the dumbest excuse I've ever heard, but if this really happened, sounds like he's going Brokeback Mountain on your ass. Best you set him straight, and I don't mean giving him a hard-on by letting him go down your front pockets! *Puke*

If you're full of shit, which you probably are, tell her the truth, but be prepared to get dumped, Beaves. Let her go if this is a habit of yours... collecting numbers, not rolling in the mud with George!

Boyfriend has male breasts... boobies!

Dear AL:
This is kind of awkward, but I have to vent. My boyfriend has boobies! Now I'm not talking sags of skin after losing weight. I'm talking jugs about the size of Pamela Andersons! We've been dating for months and I never noticed them before. Then last week I noticed his chest was buldging. He told me he just finished pumping iron at his gym, which made me so hot, I convinced him to come back to my place. I've been waiting for that special day forever. Little did I know how special he was. When he took off his shirt I couldn't believe my eyes! I was expecting buldging chest muscles. Instead I got boobies! They were larger than mine and I thought I was huge! He then said he has a confession to make. He didn't workout. I then told him that I never noticed them before. He then looked down and said he had them lifted. He lifted his man boobs! I almost threw-up when I ran to the bathroom, but after a few minutes I returned to the bedroom. I was hoping he would have his shirt on, but he was standing their with his arms crossed covering his breasts with his hands! I turned away. I then asked him if he was a transsexual, but he responded no, that they're not implants. I then asked him why he had them lifted instead of having them removed. He responded while looking down at his chest that he thought they would look better instead of sagging. I then got dressed... said sorry, and haven't seen him since.

We talked today, and he said he misses me, but I can't bring myself to see him even though I miss him to. I haven't told him how I feel. Al, I know I'll get sick to my stomach if I see them again. What would you do in my shoes?

-- Uri, Taiwan

Dear Uri:
Carry a pack of Alka-Seltzer.

Seriously, if you can't see yourself mashing your boobs against his (ew...), tell him about it. Let him know how you feel about him and maybe he'll surprise you by seeing a physician again. But if his condition is ireversible and he's comfortable about his boobies, maybe you can get use to them, but until then tell him to keep his shirt on and buy yourself some Dragon Skin body armor. You'll be alright.

Friend used me, disappeared, gave lame excuse

Dear Al:
I have been searching the internet for a place to express my discontent with a friendship and to find unbiased advice. I came across your blog and hopefully you have something enlightening to offer.

The year 2009 was a major year in the development of my personal friendships. I chose to end harmful relationships with a few people I have known for over 15 years, more than half of my life. My decisions have been very rewarding. As time passes, I feel less troubled by the decisions I have made. However, there is one friendship that has me quite confused. The friendship I speak of is the least developed relationship I have had in my life. My issue is trying to understand why it bothers me so much.

A little over three years ago we hired a new administrative assistant at my job. He was four years younger than me, so it was pretty nice to have someone working with me who I could help grow professionally. We worked very closely and I became his confidant very quickly. That was a bit awkward, but as we developed a friendship I was able to accept it more easily and still able to handle separating the professional from the personal.

Every so often we would hang out after work, play video games at my apartment, and have drinks and such – the usual friendship stuff we all know. We had much in common and quickly he began calling me his best friend. Whether it was that fact that I had good advice or that I spent more time with him than others, I was not sure. Anyhow, the major part of this became his relationship with his girlfriend. He would tell me everything and I would give him honest advice. I am in a successful 8-year gay relationship. Perhaps my experiences helped him out, when he needed the advice. Whatever it was, he confided in me and would seek me out for some type of guidance all the time. This happened only when things were bad. Since I saw him everyday it was easy to talk all the time. Eventually he got fired from the job and we saw each other less frequently, but we did hang out as usual from time to time. Then she got pregnant and things got even worse for him. I felt badly, and being the friend that I am, was very supportive and there for him anytime, any day. Ultimately things got patched up with her and he disappeared. I wouldn’t see him online, no emails, no texts or phone calls…everything died out completely. I tried a few times during his disappearance to express my discontent with the behavior, but to no avail. He would never respond or give a lame excuse and then I wouldn’t hear from him again. So I decided to end that friendship. I didn’t just end it like that – I told him I was done. As I mentioned I was going through significant changes in friendships I had for much longer than his, so losing him was no big deal.

More than a year passed and he popped up again. He began texting me and emailing me. He started telling me that he held off for long enough and that he misses me, etc, etc. I was open to discuss MY issues and I told him that I was not up for wasting time on a friendship that was one-sided. He never knew how I was really doing because he was so busy talking about his problems and I was the fool consoling him. So we discussed this and he promised to stick around and apologized for his past infractions. I had my suspicions, though. I knew things were bad for him again. Lo and behold he was in fact troubled and going through a breakup with his girlfriend, with whom he has a one year old child and lives with. I kept my guard up, but he was so persistent on hanging out all the time. He was coming over three to four times a week and actually NOT talking about his problems as much as he had in the past. I thought he seemed a bit more mature, so perhaps being so cautious was not necessary. After about three months of constant communication the holidays came and he started disappearing again. Immediately I knew things were going well with his girlfriend. I have always been an advocate of “working things out,” so I am very supportive of making things work in a relationship, especially when you have a child together. I didn’t want to make a big deal of MY issues again. I refused to come across as “dramatic” when all I really am is hurt.

So I couldn’t hold it back anymore and I sent him a text message yesterday. I asked him for 110% honesty and asked why it’s been a month and I don’t hear from him unless I reach out. Furthermore, he was here all the time, and his interest appears to have dissolved. As I expected he gave me a lame excuse about being lazy and work etc, etc. I KNOW that he doesn’t know how to balance his relationship with his girlfriend and those with his friends. I felt the need to test his honesty and he lied. I checked out FaceBook, as people seem to be more honest there than in real life, and of course, he’s back to relationship status. Now I have zero tolerance for him and I pretty much feel the need to ignore him and let that die, as I did in the past. My interest now is myself and remaining loyal to my beliefs in what a friendship should be. I know that everyone is on a different page when they define friendships, but I also know that I am not a doormat to wipe your feet clean every time your girlfriend betrays you. It’s a lose-lose situation for me and I am not sure that my decisions are always right.

So, in conclusion, I just need advice. How would you deal with this? Am I being the stubborn asshole I sometimes feel I can be?

Sincerely,
VooDoo

Dear VooDoo:
Nah... you're not an asshole. A sucker, maybe, but not an asshole.

If I was you I would take this as a lesson learned. Unless the person in need is a real friend, don't waste your time extending your hand in friendship and don't cling to hard! I'm not saying you were infatuated by him, but some might think that way since you got your Skiviez' in a twist.

Move on!

Boyfriend cheated. Did he ever loved me?

Dear AL:
I found out that my ex-bf has been two-timing me throughout the 3mths29days that we've been together. He has another long time gf of 17mths. This secret of his was exposed on the day when I happen to be in the same place as that couple. 3 of us quarrelled and he kept telling the girl he loves her and wants to be with her and he's very sorry. He totally ignored me and i was left to feel sorry for myself alone. Worse still, he told me straight in my face that "yes, I was two-timing u.So can u leave now". It hurts so much.
During the 3mths+ period, we did all sorts of couple things and he was nice to me as a bf. Assuring me of his love and says he misses me which totally sounded like he meant it. Because i'm someone who gets paranoid rather easily, he said things like "I don't hook up. I do couple-ly things with my gf only, and that's u". That is y i trusted him, even after i found suspicious things in his room, like hairband and a picture and letter from his most recent "ex"(his 17mths still ongoing long time gf). I told him just admit if he is really cheating but he chose to lie and gave acceptable reasons for the things i found. He told me this "ex" lasted 5mths and she still kept pestering him with msges and calls. She also kept threatening him with suicidial intentions. He told me he has been ignoring him until one day she stop bothering him.

Was he cheating with a shemale?

Continued...
I can't believe he said such things about her. And i can't believe he lied to me w/o battering an eyelid. On the first day after secret was exposed and i broke up with him, he said all he wants to say was a deep sorry. On the 2nd day after secret was exposed, I called to ask him if there was any moment when we were together, that he meant it when he say "i love u", or had true feelings for me for even a moment, he told me, "i really don't know". I said even a no answer won't hurt me, he still said the same reply.
I can never be with a man who cheats on me, even just once. I know i deserve better that's y i left him. Whereas she chose to stay with him, again, despite this not being the first time he cheats. According to her and to my astonishment, there were many girls before me during their 17mths tog. All i want to ask u is, do u think he has ever truly love me once? Or was i just a plaything/object in his eyes all the while?
-- Dianna

Dear Dianna:
I'm sorry to say that love was just a word to him. He probably doesn't mean it when he expressed his love for that guy, girl, whatever it is. Lets call her Frank.

He expressed his love to Frank in front of you and told you to leave. The scumbag did you a favor! When he said "I really don't know," when you asked him if he meant what he said about loving you in the past, he just wants to keep you wondering in hope you'll drop your guard enough so he could come back and use you again if things don't work out with his new toy.

Don't waste your time thinking about him. He's Franks problem now!

Look, you can do better. Take care of yourself.

He's being charged with multiple felonies.

DearAL:
I have been with the same guy for a little over 4 years. We were having a great life together when he got arrested for some bad choices he made before I met him. I wasn't aware of any of this and now my trust in him is shaken. I've been really trying to stay strong and looking at my life. I've made many positive changes and am really taking care of myself. I'm not ready to call it quits, but I don't know how to accept him keeping something so big from me for so many years. We were going to get married in May of next year, and now I'm not sure how long it will be until he's out. He is being charged with multiple felony threes.
--Kyle, Heart Broken in Co

Dear Kyle:
In Colorado, not counting class 1 felonies (murder), Beaves could go to prison anywhere from 1 to 24 years. Do you seriously want to wait for someone who kept this past a secret? Who's to say he wont do it again? It will always be in the back of your mind "Did he seriously go out with the boys to shoot pool, or to shoot someone?" Not that I'm saying he would commit this type of felony.

Here's another positive change you should make, calling it quits. Don't become his alibi for his next serious crime. You might end up doing time. Move on with your life and let him live his.

Drunk girlfriend cheated with her old best friend. Is this tattered relationship worth saving?

Hey AL:
Ok... so let me try to make a long story short. Me and my girlfriend(not a fiancee OR wife) meet, have a serious relationship. Something like out of a romance novel in terms of the way we met and fell in love. I have a bad past of girlfriends cheating on me. But I tried my best to keep my paranoia in check. Her grandmother (aka her best friend) died when she was young. She doesn't know who her mother is. Her father is a pilled out veteran on disability. Her brother, the only other person close to her. Got arrested and is now serving 20 yrs. So she has extensive abandonment issues. After a few months, and a roommate rivalry, I move in with her and her dad. A month later we get our own place, everything still going good. Crazy in love, but have our problems. 13 days before our 1 yr she invites old friends over that are in town (Which never happens because she doesn't have many friends) and ends up getting PLASTERED and making out with her old best friend in our bathroom. HUGE ordeal as you can guess. Fighting, packing, fighting, crying, begging, said I was leaving and I didn't leave. The next months were hard because all trust was gone. Honestly I stayed because of the apartment and the connection my mother and family have grown with her. My mother loves her to death. And bills are easier with two paying them. But most of all I wanted so bad for things to get better and that I could move past it. But knowing how paranoid I am, the outlook wasn't good. So now, 5 months later, I'm struggling with constant paranoia and I treat her like crap cause I have so much pent-up frustration towards her. I don't restrict her or try to control her. She has all the freedom in the world. In fact, I more push her away. I distance myself from her. My mind is filled with the most outrageous cheating scenarios all the time and it has sent my blood pressure through the roof. I'm torn. I feel like I'm stuck here with her because she has no one but me. Plus she's made pity attempts at suicide trying to get me to stay. I feel her words are true, but she has too much shadiness surrounding her. I really do I love her with all my heart, but I'm just one step out of the door. Advice please, I'm losing my mind with paranoia. Is there a mental condition for cheating paranoia? It's only with cheating, I don't get paranoid with anything else. And is this tattered relationship even worth trying for?
-- Mr. Man, my state

Yo Man:
Personally, if this was a bi thing, I would give her a second chance if she had more feelings for me and was willing to share. :-) Now if the person she kissed was a dude, that's fucked up, but she was wasted.

If you love her with all your heart and you believe her when she states her love for you, I would give her a second chance on the condition that she never drinks or talks to that guy again, or that girl if you're not interested in threesomes. She's in control when she's sober, so you have nothing to be paranoid about, specially since she's falling all over herself for you to stay. Stop treating her like shit, think of the good times you've had, and relax. Your relationship is salvageable if you stop being an ass. How many different ways does she have to say sorry for you to believe she's SORRY and will not cheat again? Give the girl a break, and your nerves, and let it go. It will haunt you of what could've been if you break up, specially since you love her. Believe me, you don't want to go through that.

KW's: excessive anxiety, fear, irrational, delusional, possible schizo (You, Man, not her)

Made out with her uncle who's close to 30

Dear AL:
I recently turned 18 and after clubbing slept at a friends with her and two other guys. We all crashed on the double bed and I ended up making out with her uncle who is close to 30. My friend suspects that we hooked up, although we tried to hide it and I think she's upset about it. What should I do? Her uncle called me today and said to just say that we were flirting with one another and it didn't go any further than holding hands etc. What if she saw us kissing or something?
-- Eliza

Dear Eliza:
Time to grow up. There's a good chance she saw you two kissing since you all shared the same bed, so lying to her will enforce her beliefs that you're both dating. Tell your friend the truth. If you are dating, it's better to come clean if you value your friendship. It's not your fault you're attracted to a loser who can't find a woman his own age. She'll understand.

Kw's: friendship, friendships, problem, teen, teenager, adult, flirt, advice, family

Best friend had an affair with my husband

Dear AL:
Last week my best friend told me that she's been having an affair with my husband for over 3 months. I've asked her why she did this, and she said she was stupid, but wished it never happened because my husband wont leave her alone. Not because she betrayed our friendship, felt bad, or was afraid she would get caught. Asshole wouldn't leave this bitch alone, so she called it quits. She then said sorry, and asked if I could tell him to leave her alone and if I want to go clubbing with her. I was speachless. It's like, hey, I've been fucking your man, you want to help me find more? I just walked away.

The same day after throwing my husband out with the help of my brothers, I bumped into my exfriend at a grocery store, and she told me she will pick me up Friday to go out, so be ready. I was so enraged, when she wasn't looking, I hit her with a bunch of bananas. Should have hit her with the green ones!

She calls me almost everyday trying to appologize for what she done, but I just can't talk. I've destroyed one of my phones because of her. My other friends are helping me through this, just wish this traitor leave me alone. What can I do to get her off my back?
-- Lost for words, Canada

Dear Lost:
You need to speak up. Tell this beotch she can shove her friendship, and if that doesn't work, just keep giving her the finger. Beats attacking her with bananas and other groceries. Think of the money you save.

Kw's: adultery, adultry, affair, affairs, cheater, cheating spouse, infidelity, marriage, unfaithful

How can I get her back?

Dear AL:
I'm living in hell. My girl broke up with me. We've been dating 4 months, but when I discovered her prosthetic toe when I jumped into the shower with her, she called it quits after smacking me a few times. She's the most sweetest person in the world, but reacted like that because how I reacted when I saw her toe on the soap dish. Just wish she told me.

We haven't been together long, but I love her very much. How can I get her back? I thank God everyday for meeting a girl like her!
-- Tony, Alaska

Dear Tony:
You should also thank God she didn't have a prosthetic leg, she would've killed you!

Declare your feelings for her by writing her a letter, then give her a day or two to contact you. If she doesn't, give her a call and tell her the same. She might need more time, so you have to be strong for the both of you. She probably was gona tell you at some point about her prosthetic, but now you know, and if you hang in there and don't give up, everything will be ok.

He's depressed day in and out

Dear Al:
I am wondering about my fiancee. He tells me that he is never happy. There was a time where he even had a plan to kill himself. At that point he actually reluctantly talked to a psychologist and was admitted overnight to the hospital. Well now he is depressed, doesn't seem to really have any goals and will not (and I repeat WILL NOT) get help. I cannot force him to talk to someone because he has not actually tried to hurt himself, but I am very worried about him. I see him be depressed day in day out and I just want to see him happy again. I just don't know what to do anymore, because I try to encourage him to talk to me, but he bottles up. What should I do? I don't want to force him to do anything, but this is just not right. He should not be this depressed all the time, but he won't get help. What am I supposed to do? -- Rose

Dear Rose:
The best course of action is to continue showing him love, do things with him to get his mind off his problems for a little while, and when you feel he's more relaxed, talk to him again about seeing a professional ASAP. If he still doesn't want to get help, continue what I stated above (love, doing things together) in hope he'll do the right thing himself.

Last course of action if nothing seems to be helping is to move on and don't look back. I'm sorry, but you have to take care of yourself. Don't let him drag you down.

He used to respond, but no longer!

Dear AL:
I met this fellow from NC, I am from MA. We've been txting for a few weeks. Next he called. We started calling and phone txting. He came to MA and we hung out for a day. We've continued to call/txt. However, now he no longer answers my emails, and this week he has taken a long time to answer my txtes/voice mails. He used to respond within a reasonable time. Now I feel like like there's something he's holding back about. Any advice?
-- Keilah, US

Dear Keilah:
Sorry it took so long to repond, some female has been distracting me with her text messages. God, she's annoying!

Anyway, have you ever been on a blind date, and when you met the person they turned out to be some dorky looking freak or a dumbass like Paris Hilton? I'm not saying you're a dog or a Jet Set moron, but sometimes these things happen. You could be the most beautiful woman on the planet inside and out, but some guys might prefer Ugly Betty.

Maybe you should lay off with the messages and voice mails, and move on. If he's really interested, he'll contact you. Don't hound him, makes you look desperate. Nobody wants a needy person, specially if you freaked him out on the first date. There's plenty of fish in the sea, don't waste your time with Charlie Tuna!

Boyfriend thinks Bloggers are needy fruitcakes

Dear Al:
Forever me and my boyfriend always gave etch other space to do whatever we wanted, like I let him go sking with his buddies and he lets me go on trips with the girls, but for the first time he doesn't want me to do something. My boyfriend wont let me go to the Blog Parteeh this year. He says Bloggers are needy fruitcakes looking for attention, except for me since I don't have a blog.

Some of my favorite bloggers are going to the Blog Parteeh and I really want to go and meet etch and every one of them. How can I convince my boyfriend to let me go?
-- Shari, Philippines

Dear Shari:
Maybe if you etch him something he might let you go.

Personally I don't see the big deal about this blog party, but you are your own person, and if your non-blogging self wants to go, GO! It's a snowball's chance in hell, but if you manage to get in, say hello to my fellow fruitcakes, except for this guy on the right.

http://blogparteeh.com

Technorati: party, parteeh, blogparteeh07, needy, relationships, boyfriend, wants, fruitcakes, advice, blog, weblog, blogger, bloggers, column, solutions, everyday, problems, dear al

Like many a hapless man he can't see her games

DearAL:
My boyfriend insists on seeing his ex-girlfriend socially still which i find hard to deal with. am i being a psychotic jealous bint, or is it reasonable to ask then to stop meeitng. Btw-i have a suspision she is being manipulative and like many a hapless man he can't see her games.

Many thanks,
-- Baire, England

Dear Baire:
Sounds more like you can't see through his games, and if you're allowing them to meeit, you are a psychotic bint!

now if they became friends after their breakup, months before meeting you, then i wouldn't be suspisious about their friendship unless he spends more time with her than with you. but if you two started dating soon after they broke-up, or if you was the reason for their breakup, then you have a problem.

since this is driving you crazy, tell him he has a choice, either you or her. if he wont drop his friendship, break it off with him, then use your free time wisely so the next person you email wont make fun of your writing. i hope this helped!

Technorati: advice, advice blog, advice blogger, counsel, recommendation, recommendations, opinion, opinions, friendship, friendships, relationship, relationships, jealously, boyfriend, boyfriend

A friend thinks I should pull a Britney Spears

Dear AL:
First I have to say, I really enjoy reading your blog.
I'm a known actress, but not on the scale my manager thinks I have the potential to become. I played in a few movies, episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and other TV series. Anyway, a friend of mine thinks I should pull a Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan upskirt, by letting photographers catch me with no underwear underneath a miniskirt. She keeps telling to do this, and it's getting on my nerves. My friend who's an unknown actress is the best, but how can I tell her that I'm not gona pull a pathetic stunt like that?
-- Your California Fan

Dear Fan:
Giving away clues? Do you want me to tell my readers who I think you are, or pretending to be? Get a life! But if you're that actress... Where were you when I went to band camp? :P

Anyway, tell your friend that showing off your cooch will just justify those morons thinking that the only thing females have worth anything is their vagina. You're obviously very intelligent for making it as far as you did in the entertainment industry. If she continues bugging you to do this, remind the genius where she stands in the food chain compared to you, then throw her a biscuit. Hope this helped!

Technorati: advice, advice blog, advice blogger, counsel, recommendation, recommendations, opinion, opinions, friendship, friendships, Britney Spears, Britney, Studivz, Spears, Spear, Lindsay Lohan, crotch shot, upskirt, up skirt, photo, nude photo, vagina, entertainment, entertainment industry, star

Putting Out More Than The Average Married Woman

Dear AL:
I'm certainly no prude but I have a friend who, let's just say, is putting a little more out there on the internet than the average married woman normally would.
She's the talk of the town and it is only a matter of time before her husband finds out. She's my friend and she doesn't seem too concerned. Should I be concerned for her or just forget it? -- Not A Prude

Dear Prude:
I mean, Dear Not!

Sounds like your friend is bored at home, unhappy with her marriage, or is addicted to Half-Nekkid Thursday "HNT", which isn't a bad thing unless her husband finds out. Talk to your friend, let her know you're concerned, right after you send me the link to her blog! ;)

Wifey, I'm just kidding!

This is gona be my last bit of advice for a while. I removed the email form from the sidepanel. Thanks for reading my blog and your submissions people! Take care!

Filed under: advice, friendships, on the internet

We'll Hurt Her Feelings! What Can We Do?

Dear AL:
We have this friend who always sticks around us. And we kind of don't like her to stick to us because her jokes are really lame and she really embarrasses us when we go out together. Plus, we didn't even invite her to come along! If we tell her that we don't want her to tag along, we'll hurt her feelings. What can we do?
-- Silly Girls

Yo Silly:
Aren't friends suppose to stick together? Why call her a friend if you don't want her to hang around with you?

If she's a friend, let her know when she makes a lame joke or embarasses you. Friends suppose to help each other out. But if she's the kind of person who gets her kicks out of embarrassing you and your friends with insults, spreading rumors, or cruel jokes, ect... tell her to stop or find new friends. Don't worry about hurting her feelings if she's cruel, it will make her a better person or turn her into the next Ann Coulter. I hope this helped!

Filed under: advice, friendships

Cheating Friend

Dear Al:
I have a friend that has been cheating on her husband for over a year with one man. Her husband works out of the country for weeks at a time so she has a lot of time to carry on with this other guy. The thing is, her husband isn't the nicest guy in the world (he's sometime physically and emotionally abusive). The other man, is someone she virtually takes care of. She pays bills for him, buys him clothing, picks up the tabs when they go out, everything. He practically lives there when the husband is out of town. She claims she's in love with this guy and will not leave him alone, even though she know's he sees other women (so does her husband, yes this is a messy situation). The thing is though, the other week, she calls me and says "I'm going to tell my husband I let you borrow $1,000 but really I'm going to give it to [the other man] so he can pay his court fees" (he got a DUI). So I immediately was like hell no don't put me in the middle of your stories! So my question is, if the shit ever hit the fan (which I know it will) I don't want to be an accessory to this whole thing. Should I tell her I don't want to hang out with her anymore? Even though I know what she's been doing I know I can't be responsible for what a grown woman decides to do. But since I am actually a friend to her and her husband, and thinking about it I'm her only female friend (husband doesn't approve of her having many friends). I just feel like I'm caught in the middle of something that's going to conclude in a very, very brutal manner.
-- Caught in the middle, theartofstiltwalking.blogspot.com

Dear Caught:
A friend wouldn't try to pull you into her mess and risk a friendship. Doesn't sound like she gives a damn about you, just the leech that's taken her for a fool! Yes, don't hang out with her anymore. Drop her and her husband like a bad habit, avoid their place like the GAP! ;)

Don't be caught in the middle like the cream in an Oreo cookie, they'll chew your ass up! I hope this helped!