Dear Al:I don’t know how to begin, thinking about all this had made me frustrated,enough to try every stupid thing I could, It’s a long story and I hope you’ll give me a solution that works with me.
Ever since I was small I have this habit of keeping all my friends together (which doesn’t seem to happen).When I joined jr. high school(class 9) all my friend that I previously had were separated from me, and I made new friends too, but that is later on part. But one day there were incidents of stealing in our class, everybody was confused….no body had any clue who did it, incidentally at that time I didn’t have much good friends (they came much after) so I spent most of my time alone and left the class last so, people thought I was the thief, I faced huge humiliation and there was just one girl (my oldest friend whom I didn’t talk to much) who took my side and went against everybody. Initially everybody realized that I was not the one and the matter was buried.
Later when I had this huge bffs group. We have this tradition in school of giving a good luck party to our seniors (10 grade) so we were all dressed up and wore our best of ethnic clothes we have in India. The day passed we had a lot of pics clicked up. When we later loaded them up on fb everybody realized that one of my friends, lets call her ‘S’, was wearing a band similar to one that had been stolen, later on a lot of such ‘similar’ to the stolen things were found against her, but ‘s’ was a goody girl all her records were clear and initially nobody believed that she could be the one not even me,. So we tried to put off the matter somehow, but nobody knows how(or at least till I know) she got to know that we had ‘realized’ that she was the ‘one’, and the next day she came to the class and was sitting separately, later on she started crying and confessed that somebody had told her all. Now the discussion fueled up and there were group with and against her. Initially I was with her but then turned against her too. The against group was a small one as compared to the with one. Later we had a pretty huge fight and then the against and the with people got separate. This bothered me much as now there was a cold war always going between us making separate plans and keeping sweet faces in front and backbiting, this is happening even now. The difference is that we ‘try’ to keep every thing sweet. We never knew who the culprit was and nobody wants to know too, as the whole fight was really bitter and harsh. Everything was right but somehow ‘s’ keeps brewing up new controversies against us in the with group, she keeps telling them that we are planning something against her, in fact we are not.
Now what I want is that...
1. We all get together again and everything solves up…no body has bitter feelings about anybody.
2. If that cannot happen I want the real face of ‘s’ to come up.
Please alf help me whenever I think about the old time when all of us were together with no fight it was all so great……….please help me.
- Sad Soul, India
Dear Sad:
Did it ever occurred to you that unless the stolen band was handmade, maybe the band in the photo belongs to 'S' and all the crap she's being accused of taking. It's like me being accused of stealing a pair of smelly sneakers because I happen to be wearing the same style from that brand. And oh... Don't forget my cell phone! It's looks like the same one that came up missing the day before, like the Ipod that I own that someone lost two days ago. OMG!
What choices of material do you have in your area if the band 'S' wore happens to be handmade? Maybe she made it herself and happen to pick the same material. I make a bet some of your clothes happens to match your friends. Does that mean you stole them? Oh shit!
Look, give 'S' a break. Of course she's paranoid about you and your friends. You turned against her with no proof, just the thought "Doh! she's also wearing the same perfume!" Time to grow up.
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