Mom embarasses me. Friends ignore me. School sucks!

Dear AL:
I have a few problems here, and I was hoping to get your advice.

1) My mother has taken to contradicting me for the fun of it, and sometimes makes remarks in public that she knows will embarrass me. She's a middle-aged, professional woman, which only makes the situation more ridiculous. What do you think of this?

2) I have few friends, and even fewer really close friends, whom I can get along and enjoy going out with. All is well, except that three of them have a ridiculous habit of ignoring phone calls or messages, and basically being un-contactable. I've had instances where one turned up three hours late and casually commented that she had forgotten to turn on her mobile phone. It's getting to the point that it's ridiculous, and apologies from them just don't cut it. What should I do?

3) My school has a thing about group work, and while I get along alright with my classmates, everyone already has a fixed group of friends, which means I end up as the last, pathetic one, begging smaller groups to include me. As you see it, Al, is there anyway around it?

Please help, Al. Any advice will be appreciated!

Thanks.
- Alice

Dear Alice:
You sound like a real winner.

I'm not sure why your mom treats you like shit. Maybe it has something to do with what you say, which might explain why your friends ignore your phone calls and text messages. Doh!

Either you're annoying the fuck out of everyone, your friends and classmates with senseless rants, being too needy, or you're really nice and everyone around you are a bunch of assholes, including your mom. Even if you're an idiot, not that I'm saying you are, just if, your mom shouldn't be embarrassing you. Or maybe she's just trying to save ya from embarrassing yourself that you're taking it the wrong way. I'm not there to hear what comes out of your mouth, or why your mom embarrasses you in public, so it's not easy to figure if you're mentally challenged or your moms a bitch.

My advice to you, think before you open your mouth. Know who you're with... who you're talking to. Let people like you... not by talking them to death over stupid shit (gossip), complaining or begging, but being independent and positive. If this doesn't change your mom, fuck what she thinks. Be polite and ignore the witch. You're not going to be living with her forever, or are ya?