Is Firefox Playing Big Brother?

Dear Al:
Every now and then when I delete my Temporary Internet files after being on the internet for about 15 minutes, System Mechanic finds and erases between 3 to 4GB of these temporary internet files! Where are all these files coming from? All this started right after I upgraded my Firefox browser to the latest version. My firewall (Zonealarm) blocks all programs trying to access the internet except Firefox, is Firefox uploading files to my computer? Is this a security flaw, or is Firefox playing Big Brother?
-- Katja, Germany

Dear Katja:
It's probably Firefox. By default, Firefox updates it's self, but you can manually turn that off under options if you're not comfortable with it. Talk to your husband about the 3 to 4GB's of temporary internet files. God help you if he has a thing for Carrot Top!

If you're also using Bill Gate's crapy Internet Explorer, that could be the problem. To see if it is, make the Internet Explorer your default browser for a few days, and if you're still having the same problem, then you found the culprit! Make Firefox your default browser, block the Internet Explorers access to the internet with Zonealarm, and that should do it.

If you're still having the same problem after that, I have nothing else to say except YOU'RE SCREWED!

You're No Dear To Me!

Al, who the heck do u think u are anyway?
U are no Dear to me.
If it haven't been for me it hadn't be any happy eastern to celebrate.
-- JudasOnline, Norway

Dear Judas:
Waah!

Love your English by the way... George!

I Have A Big Problem!

Dear Al:
A few days ago I woke up and realized there was something hard in my boxer shorts. I tried to ignore it and a few minutes later it went away. Since then I was afraid of getting this thing again. Today in school I saw a very pretty girl and suddenly I had the feeling that my trousers were too tight. I nearly started to cry, because I din´t know what was going on. here in Germany exists a magazin called "Bravo", which has got an extra part about sexuality. It´s called " Dr. Sommer Team". An inner voice told me to ask the team around Dr. Sommer for help. But I´m too afraid they print my letter in there magazin and everyone in school loughes about me. So I´m searching the anonymity of the I-Net and I´m asking you for help. What can I do against that hard thing? but the most important question is: What the hell is that thing in my boxer shorts?

Peace for the world says Friedel and wishes Al a great day.
-- Friedel, Germany, Sankt Augustin

Dear Friedel:
Sounds like you have a serious case of Bratwurst! You need to seek a professional to have it surgically removed, then visit the town hall to change your name to Frieda. I hope this helped!

Say if I Quit Chips And Coke

Dear Al:
Your solutions are crass - but funny and makes so much sense lol.

I'm so sick of being overweight and not having a life, but I'm food greedy and keep eating junk at home--> especially to CELEBRATE a weight loss X(

Say if this guy liked me now and we get along, would he ask me out after I quit chips and coke and glamour up? I duno... shout at me Al.
-- yo-yo dieter, Sidney, Australia

Dear Yo-Yo Dieter:
Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Did that help? No?

Look, you might have a chance with him right now! Quit the junkfood for yourself, not to attract this guy. Consult your doctor before you start any weight loss program, diets, or workout. I hope this helped!

How To Write A Girl

Dear Al:
I've been wondering why girls are such a pain? I love one girl, but she just never gonna accept me. Once I messaged her this "Hey can we be together, tough im fat. Can? Please..." She replied " No! I don't like fat and ugly guy." I'm not that UGLY as she said and not that FAT. I am just a cool guy who understands people feelings, and chat with them while they are down. Please, AL, Advice please. :)
-- Fabb, Singapore

Dear Fabb:
First you tell her you're fat, then you state you're not that fat... Are you nuts?

Never ever put yourself down when you're writing a girl! They already know what you look like, you don't have to remind them. Second, don't beg! The feel sorry for me act doesn't work, specially when you're fat. Nobody wants to be with a needy person!

When you write a girl, compliment her, but don't over do it. You need to grab their attention, not scare them away! If you still love this girl that called you fat and ugly, you have some serious problems.

Good luck!