Dear AL:
I recently turned 18 and after clubbing slept at a friends with her and two other guys. We all crashed on the double bed and I ended up making out with her uncle who is close to 30. My friend suspects that we hooked up, although we tried to hide it and I think she's upset about it. What should I do? Her uncle called me today and said to just say that we were flirting with one another and it didn't go any further than holding hands etc. What if she saw us kissing or something?
-- Eliza
Dear Eliza:
Time to grow up. There's a good chance she saw you two kissing since you all shared the same bed, so lying to her will enforce her beliefs that you're both dating. Tell your friend the truth. If you are dating, it's better to come clean if you value your friendship. It's not your fault you're attracted to a loser who can't find a woman his own age. She'll understand.
Kw's: friendship, friendships, problem, teen, teenager, adult, flirt, advice, family
She no lik me enymor!
Dear AL:
Hav a nise girlfrend bupt dink she no lik me enymor. Lass time she com to mi haus she leeve soon bupt com bak bupt no tork an leeve aygen. Wat can I do so mi girlfrend lik me lik befor?
-- Marat, Қазақстан
Dear Marat:
Take showers or she will never lick ya again.
Seriously, give her breathing room. Now I'm not saying that you stink, just give her space to think. Before doing so, call her up and let her know how you feel. If she still doesn't like ya after a few days, move on. Life is short.
Kw's: girlfriend, dating, relationship problem, problems, breakup
My Husbands affair with best friend. We have 2 children!
Dear AL:
My husband had an affair with my best friend. He says he didn't sleep with her, but he wont stop communicating with her. We have 2 children! HELP!
-- Cassie --
Dear Cassie:
I don't know of an affair where sex wasn't involved, that's unless numbnuts really has numb nuts, then he might be telling the truth. If you just want to save your marriage because of your two children, then it sounds like you have a business relationship, which is probably why he cheated. I'm not saying it's your fault. It takes two to make a marriage work, or not.
You can try marriage counseling, but if he doesn't want to try that, talk to him. Find out what's lacking in your relationship that he seems to be getting from your girlfriend, and not just sex. If he doesn't want to talk about it, then do what's best for your children... divorce. Don't put your kids through an unhappy marriage. It will effect them when they're adults.
Kw's: adultery, adultry, affair, affairs, best friend, cheater, cheating spouse, children, infidelity, marriage, unfaithful
He obviously wants to meet me
Dear AL:So I have been chatting to this guy online for months. He lives in another country and he is moving to the same city as me. I'm extremely nervous because he obviously wants to meet me. I am not the most attractive person, and I just don't want to get rejected. Should I pass on the date, take someone with me to take off the pressure, or go and take my chances? -- J
Dear J:
I hate to be the one to have advised you to your own death, but since you've obviously want to meet him, I say bring a friend along. Since you're worried about rejection, maybe you should do a little cam to cam with him. Better to get rejected online than him standing you up because he got a good look at you from a distance. Hell, he might be butt ugly, but I hope you would give him a chance.
Meet at a public place a few times to get a feel for him. If all of a sudden he asks for your help in recovering money that needs to be transfered to your account, asks for money, or if you could go to his country for whatever, RUNAWAY! Chances are he doesn't plan on staying in your country longer than a weeks if that's the case. Sounds fishy that he's moving to your state. Don't get scammed!
I'm being harassed at work!
Dear AL
There are these people that keep harassing me every week at my job. When they order food at the drive threw they always ask for whoppers knowing full well they're at McDonalds! What can I tell these people to leave me alone?
-- Upset in Seattle Washington
Dear Upset:
Tell them no pork at all.
Um.. upset... you work at a fast food place. Maybe it's the same jokers harassing you every week, but I bet they're probably confused customers. I don't know how many times I asked for happy meals at Burger King, so this might be the case.
If it is the same people, have your supervisor take the order. Don't burst a vessel over this, or you'll never make manager!
What would Ronald do?
My Husband's affair with a girl at the gym
Dear AL:
My Christmas present for 2008 was learning of an affair my husband was having with a girl at the gym. He continued the affair by purchasing "pay as you go" phones to eliminate any phone records - I found his phone. He says he has discontinued the affair but continues to go to the same gym, at the same time she goes, and refuses to change. There are other alternatives and times for him to go.
Am I making too much of this, or should I follow my gut instinct and file for divorce.
--Devastated and Pissed in NY
Dear Devastated:
You're not making enough of this... divorce his sorry ass. If he discontinued this affair, why doesn't he go to a different gym to give you peace of mind? Hell, he might do just that when you threaten him with a divorce, but who's to say she wont follow him there to continue their workout? Do you really want to deal with this, not knowing if he's being faithful? Always having this on the back of your mind "Is he telling me the truth, or spotting her?" Do yourself a favor and save yourself the stress. Divorce him! If he doesn't care about your feelings now, he will continue to play with your head, guaranteed.
Life is too short and may become shorter if he infects you with Aids. Think about that. Take care of yourself.
Kw's: adultery, adultry, affair, affairs, cheater, cheating spouse, infidelity, marriage, unfaithful
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