Putting Out More Than The Average Married Woman

Dear AL:
I'm certainly no prude but I have a friend who, let's just say, is putting a little more out there on the internet than the average married woman normally would.
She's the talk of the town and it is only a matter of time before her husband finds out. She's my friend and she doesn't seem too concerned. Should I be concerned for her or just forget it? -- Not A Prude

Dear Prude:
I mean, Dear Not!

Sounds like your friend is bored at home, unhappy with her marriage, or is addicted to Half-Nekkid Thursday "HNT", which isn't a bad thing unless her husband finds out. Talk to your friend, let her know you're concerned, right after you send me the link to her blog! ;)

Wifey, I'm just kidding!

This is gona be my last bit of advice for a while. I removed the email form from the sidepanel. Thanks for reading my blog and your submissions people! Take care!

Filed under: advice, friendships, on the internet

We'll Hurt Her Feelings! What Can We Do?

Dear AL:
We have this friend who always sticks around us. And we kind of don't like her to stick to us because her jokes are really lame and she really embarrasses us when we go out together. Plus, we didn't even invite her to come along! If we tell her that we don't want her to tag along, we'll hurt her feelings. What can we do?
-- Silly Girls

Yo Silly:
Aren't friends suppose to stick together? Why call her a friend if you don't want her to hang around with you?

If she's a friend, let her know when she makes a lame joke or embarasses you. Friends suppose to help each other out. But if she's the kind of person who gets her kicks out of embarrassing you and your friends with insults, spreading rumors, or cruel jokes, ect... tell her to stop or find new friends. Don't worry about hurting her feelings if she's cruel, it will make her a better person or turn her into the next Ann Coulter. I hope this helped!

Filed under: advice, friendships

I was a childhood friend of Ann Coulter

Dear AL:
I was a childhood friend of Ann Coulter when she had a different name, sex, and personality. I can't believe the monster he has become today!

He (Ann)... yes he was sweet, shy, and insecure, that a small group of children bullied him right up until the end of High School. He vowed to get even with everybody, just didn't think it would be the whole country looking the way he does now! I just can't see him in a dress!

Al, is there anyway to bring back the sweet boy I remember?
-- Anonymous Friend

Dear Anonymous:
You're joking, right? Well, Ann does have flippers for feet.

There's a point of no return, and Ann Coulter has crossed it, right after his sex change operation, so you say. What was his name before? Earl?

***Looking again*** OMG, those feet!

Anyway, anonymous, Earl is never coming back. Stop living in the past!

Update: For my readers who never heard of Ann Coulter, just check out these links:
Ann's Quotes: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Ann_Coulter
About Ann: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ann_Coulter

My Best Friend Is Not Taking My Calls

Dear Al:
i don't know what to do. my best friend of two years is not picking up my call because i stuffed up our meeting. again. but i have improved!

of course i can apologise and she will probably be happy and full-on buddies again...but, im feeling so tired of her. you know those sort of people who get cut-up even about lame things?

theres an end all feeling when shes mad at me..=(
-- Tired Friend, Sydney

Dear Tired Friend:
What do you mean you stuffed up the meeting? You invited too many people to the conference room so your friend had to sit out in the hall, or did you fart?

If you stuffed up meetings more than once, farting, whatever... I can understand her being upset if this is a regular occurrence of yours. If she's just too picky about everything, let her know how you feel, preferably outside so she wont suffocate! I hope this helped!

Comments closed on posts older than 2 weeks.

Feeling So Conflicted!

Dear Al:
You seem like a decent guy, and I would just like a little bit of advice about a friend of mine.

Y'see, I had a friend who'll I'll call Z. The problem is, though she was my friend, she was always so needy, clingy, and darn right insulting to me and about my friends (when in my opinion she had no reason to be like that over herslef or others), yet I was fine with her as I rarely saw her and sometimes she could be fun(plus we had similar music tastes). She seemed to like me, and used me to as a earpiece.

However, I've recently gone to university and have escaped her influence. While there I have also got myself a boyfriend who I think the world of. However, M has decided to generally be insulting to me over email about me ('I've changed' as I don't have enough time to listen to her problems all evening) and my boyfriend-a lad she has never met. It came to a head when I stuck up for another friend and she said that I was generally disaggreeing with her too much in a matter of speaking with a few more swear words. After all I have done for her, I stopped speaking to her.

The problem is, as a friend I miss her. She could be funny and I keep on replaying the arguement in my head as there was so much I wish I had told her about how fustrated she made me and how she wound me up with her continual whining.

You must think I'm an idiot for putting up with someone like that for so long. To be honest, I think I am, but that is largely due to being as tolerant with people as physically possible. I just hate the idea of people not liking me or falling out with me.

All I would like to know is; did I do the right thing stopping myself from talking to this friend, and how can I stop feeling so conflicted over Z?

Ta, Al!
-- X

Dear X:
Is M also Z? I'm lost on the second paragraph!

If this problem with your friend is troubling you, give her a call and try to patch things up, but that doesn't mean to kiss her ass! She either has to accept you having other friends or accept not having you as a friend, and if she has nothing else to talk about other than problems 24-7, she needs to seek a psychiatrist. Friends can disagree and still be friends, but if she can't handle that... drop this fruit cake!

Z will grow up one day, but until then hang out with the rest of the alphabet!

Difficult Making Friends

Dear Al:
My husband and I moved out to the east coast two years ago. We both have very demanding jobs and his job has him gone weeks at a time. The one thing that I am finding difficult is finding new friends. My husband's schedule is unpredicable so we can not plan around it. I am 28 years old and it seems like everyone already has a group of friends. It isn't like college and everyone is in the same position you are. I feel like such a nerd trying to make friends.
Any suggestions?
--New kid on the block

Dear New Kid:
Sucks to be you!

Seriously, making new friends takes time, but you don't have any after two years? Talk about living in a bubble!

Get involved in community activities, and I'm not talking about dealing drugs. Look into faith based community activities, sports, and special interest activities, but don't put all your eggs in one basket. If you're not interested in community activities, you're screwed! Just kidding!

If you want friends, you need to be out there, not kooked up in your home hoping someone comes knocking. Good luck, New Kid!

Embarrassed A Friend

Dear Al:
A couple of days ago we embarrassed a friend of ours, but we didn't mean it. He always drags us to a restaurant that sometime serves American fortune cookies, but now they are stating that they are authentic Chinese fortune cookies. Usually they just bring us traditional Chinese deserts but the last time we was their they served us fortune cookies. We told the waiter who looked angry the whole night "no thanks" politely, but he keep saying that we would like these new Chinese fortune cookies. We then look at each other with beaver faces, like Rockchild's friend Alice, and told the waiter if he ment American fortune cookies. The waiter then yelled back to us "They are Chinese!", and threw the plate of cookies on our table like we are prisoners! After we gave each other the beaver face again, we paid and took the cookies. When we escaped the restaurant we ate the fortune cookies and one of our fortunes stated "Don't get even... get odd!", so we both stared into the restaurant with our faces pressed up against it's windows almost a hole minute. Our friend then got mad at us and said "How can you both do that? I eat here!" We told him we was sorry, but he is not talking to us!

Al, we don't understand why he would still want to eat their after the way we was treated and not be friends anymore with us! What do you think??
-- Back Dormitoy Boys, twochineseboys.blogspot.com

Dear Dormitory Boys:
You get treated like crap at this restaurant he drags you to, and he's embarrassed of what you did? Sounds like it doesn't matter to swellhead how you two was treated, he's a regular there! He's not a friend, so I wouldn't worry about Beavis.

If you know when he visits that restaurant, and if you have time, go there and give him beaver faces with your face pressed up against their window. Make Rockchild proud!

I didn't know Fortune cookies was invented in the states! We've been had!

Cheating Friend

Dear Al:
I have a friend that has been cheating on her husband for over a year with one man. Her husband works out of the country for weeks at a time so she has a lot of time to carry on with this other guy. The thing is, her husband isn't the nicest guy in the world (he's sometime physically and emotionally abusive). The other man, is someone she virtually takes care of. She pays bills for him, buys him clothing, picks up the tabs when they go out, everything. He practically lives there when the husband is out of town. She claims she's in love with this guy and will not leave him alone, even though she know's he sees other women (so does her husband, yes this is a messy situation). The thing is though, the other week, she calls me and says "I'm going to tell my husband I let you borrow $1,000 but really I'm going to give it to [the other man] so he can pay his court fees" (he got a DUI). So I immediately was like hell no don't put me in the middle of your stories! So my question is, if the shit ever hit the fan (which I know it will) I don't want to be an accessory to this whole thing. Should I tell her I don't want to hang out with her anymore? Even though I know what she's been doing I know I can't be responsible for what a grown woman decides to do. But since I am actually a friend to her and her husband, and thinking about it I'm her only female friend (husband doesn't approve of her having many friends). I just feel like I'm caught in the middle of something that's going to conclude in a very, very brutal manner.
-- Caught in the middle, theartofstiltwalking.blogspot.com

Dear Caught:
A friend wouldn't try to pull you into her mess and risk a friendship. Doesn't sound like she gives a damn about you, just the leech that's taken her for a fool! Yes, don't hang out with her anymore. Drop her and her husband like a bad habit, avoid their place like the GAP! ;)

Don't be caught in the middle like the cream in an Oreo cookie, they'll chew your ass up! I hope this helped!